FIRST STEP TOWARDS BECOMING A ROUNDED PERSONALITY
FIRST STEP TOWARDS BECOMING A ROUNDED PERSONALITY
Second Edition
Years ago, I swam in the shallow waters of what higher education entails – like most freshmen today. Upon gaining admission to the University in 2016, I had a simple agenda and I conversed with the still voice within me: 'Dimeji, maximize campus life.' I was not really clear on how I was to go about it, but I holistically envisioned myself having a balanced lifestyle and being fulfilled.
In the long run (five years after), I had mixed feelings. I did achieve some of my targets and had shortcomings in some. I regretted not doing certain things like: leveraging some opportunities that I saw, exploring frontiers and harnessing some benefits. Inasmuch as people may think I had a fulfilled life on campus, my experience reveals some aspects I didn't explore, nitty-gritties I did not get and intricacies that were not demystified early enough. Hence, my thought: 'I would not want those coming behind or those out of the system to make these mistakes. I want those coming behind to have a shinning example that awaits them.'
First, I discovered that beyond being intentional about maximizing campus life or becoming a balanced personality, one needs a 'support system.' A support system that will be a careful combination and configuration of everything you ever wished for. Literally, I am referring to your friends or network. The mistake some folks make is that, they confine themselves to making friends only with a certain set of people. It is either they are seen only at religious gatherings, social gatherings, or perhaps they are seen only with scholarly friends, while they jettison other relationships. The aforementioned orientation is really not good enough and such a mentality could limit one's journey to a successful life.
Moreover, this is also applicable to the recent graduates or youths reading this; you cannot really make substantial exploits if you do not have a balanced personality. Inasmuch as commitment to your faith is paramount, you must not be too religious, or perceived as too serious. And in some cases, too loose (socially).
Moving on, the first step towards becoming a rounded personality is to resolve to being versatile with the friends you keep. Versatility is one of the skills I implore you to passionately develop. The people we surround ourselves with, to a large extent, will determine a lot of our outcomes. Friends may have the greatest influence on us, even more than our immediate family.
Personally, being able to maintain a balanced lifestyle was premised largely on self awareness and my ability to identify the competencies of those around me. I knew one person cannot have it all, but one person (you) can consciously work towards embodying it all. You have to pick the pieces from people to cater for your own inadequacies and perceived weaknesses.
In furtherance, back then on campus, I took conscious steps to have a balanced lifestyle. I moved with the erudite scholars; I had another group of friends that were considered top socialites; I also moved with changemakers who were very accomplished in the social impact space; I was very much open to both Islamic and Christian gatherings (I made appearances at Christian fellowships and I also attended yearly Ramadan lectures organized by one of my lecturers, from 2016 till my final year). Here are the big questions: What is stopping you from being a rounded personality? What are the constraints? I really do not see any, except for the fact that you need to have a much more open disposition about people and what they have to offer.
Also, making new friends and building quality relationships are beautiful things, but having the right combination of friends makes you phenomenal. The world needs you to be phenomenal if you really want to be reckoned with. At this juncture, pause for a minute and ponder over this: Do I really have the right combination of friends or am I in the right circle?
Consequently, if I need someone to pray with today, do I have a close friend I can call upon? If I need someone to take me through an academic task, do I have a close friend to help me? If I need someone as a companion or one that can ease life's hassles and bustles, do I have a close friend to contact? If I want to become involved in community service, do I have a close friend I can work with? If I am looking at ways to break into the industry, do I have a close friend who is already an established professional to lead me through the process? Do you notice that there is an emphasis on 'close friend'. You can have thousands of friends but do you have friends that you share special chemistry with and they have crucial roles they play in your life? That is exactly what you need.
Basically, I owe a lot of things that I did achieve to the friends I kept. They all played pivotal roles at one point in time. In the words of Osho: 'No one is superior, no one is inferior, and nobody is equal either; people are simply unique and incomparable. YOU are YOU and I remain I." Making reference to this quote gives credence to the belief that everyone has their competencies and a smart person is expected to identify everyone for their competencies; and see how they can use it to their personal advantage.
On the other hand, for you to sustain friendships, you must have something to offer. Friendship must be symbiotic (where both parties benefit). Here are few questions to ask yourself: What am I known for? What is my value proposition? What do I have to offer? If it is taxing or difficult for you to identify what you are known for, then it means you need physical and psychological repositioning; work on yourself and make your personal rebranding.
To conclude, becoming a rounded personality is largely premised on the calibre of people you have around you. In their individual confines, they should inspire you to do more and you should work towards portraying some positive traits about them. Unarguably, a combination of component parts make up an integrated whole (YOU).
Guiding Principle: In all, don't forget to set boundaries. Avoid SEE FINISH!
CHALLENGE FOR THE WEEK: Are you ready to have a balanced circle of friends or build a strong network?
NEXT EDITION: Topical issues will definitely come in at this point. What you should do and what not to do, towards maximizing life and attaining your full potentials.
Thanks for reading this newsletter. Cheers to better days ahead full of express accomplishments.
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FIRST STEP TOWARDS BECOMING A ROUNDED PERSONALITY
Very enlightening. I look forward to reading more of your newsletters🥂
This really hit me seriously.
What is my value proposition, what do people know me for? That's my take home.
Thanks for the piece boss